Short-lived memories: Culture Minister blames overnight dating for unsuccessful marriages

By Elias Hakizimana

Marriages that have been formed as a result of quick dating such as through meeting in bus travel, entertainment spots, and social media chats such as via WhatsApp and Facebook, are likely to fail, the Minister for Sports and Culture has warned.

Minister Julienne Uwacu said that there is no sustainability of families founded in such situations, noting they are among the root causes of marriage breaking up after a while.

“Nowadays, a boy and a girl meet in bus and plan for an immediate wedding, that kind of marriage which I can otherwise call ‘.com wedding’ cannot last longer or be sustainable,” Uwacu said.

“Building a family is not like shopping a cloth from a fashion shop,” she noted.

Uwacu made such remarks while talking about current dating ways by some young people on October 3, 2017 during the meeting which brought together the Ministry of Gender and Family Promotion (MIGEPROF), Rwanda Governance Board (RGB) and Clerics to understand their role in developing a descent family.

Comparing the current procedures in finding a suitable partner and the procedures in the past where both young man and lady who were engaged had to know each other for a sizeable period of time [some years] in line with culture and discipline before they got married, the Minister said it is quite impossible for the couple to meet and plan for a wedding ceremony after one month, the scenario which she said is the main cause of marriages falling apart at the present.

ʺKnowing each other was the only way to determine and find out the person with whom you will spend all the time together and know his/her behaviour. It is through that activity you could know about his/her family’s discipline and what he/she likes most,” she said.

In case of misunderstanding between two partners after being married from bus, Minister Uwacu said, the husband fails to know where to accuse the girl as their meeting was in a bus.

“They do not even tell parents when they meet. Where can you send her in case of misunderstanding about your relationship? Can you send her into that bus where you met each other? Uwacu asked.

She recommended clerics on further training young ladies and gents who want to have religious wedding to avoid early wedding breakups.

Uwacu said that such challenges contributed to lots of children who are still present on streets as they were born under such circumstances wherebthye did not receive quality care from both parents.

Monsingor Alexis Birindabagabo of Gahini Diocese said that the Church is going to engage more in training young people who are planning to enter into marriage through the process of building awareness of each other before they get married.

ʺWe all together have contributions to offer end problems facing the family as the government and clerics. What was missing is our joint efforts to tackle such challenges. So, we must enhance efforts in preparing young people who are engaged to marry each other,” Birindabagabo noted.

Uwacu said that currently, the number of divorced couples as well as gender based-violence was increased, though there is not yet ready statistics about such issue.

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Elias Hakizimana

Elias Hakizimana, CEO&Founder of The Inspirer Ltd,(www.rwandainspirer.com) is a professional Rwandan Journalist with Bachelor’s Degree in Journalism and Communication, received from University of Rwanda’s College of Arts and Social Sciences (CASS) in 2014. He served various media houses in Rwanda including Rwanda Broadcasting Agency (RBA) in 2013 and became passionate with English Online and Print Media Publications where he exercised his talent as a Freelance News Reporter for The New Times, The Independent, The Rwanda Focus, Panorama and more before he became a Self-Entrepreneur as the CEO and Founder of The Inspirer Limited in early 2017.

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